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December 2018

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All about ME

Age. 37
Gender. Female
Ethnicity. Is that really important?
Location Bay Area, CA
» More info.
Wednesday. 3.24.04 5:04 pm

Hahahaaha, this picture is HILARIOUS! Me, Tracy, and Jason laughed for hours on end when we saw this picture. Not to mention we were blazed... so yeah.

Lil' Asian boyee got O*W*N*E*D big time! Sucks to be you, homie.

Comment! (3) | Recommend!

Shitty day
Tuesday. 3.16.04 10:04 am
It's only 10 AM and already I'm having a SHITTY DAY.

Comment! (2) | Recommend!

Lesbian tendencies
Thursday. 3.4.04 3:05 pm

Is she H-O-T or what?

If there is one thing that Jason and I can agree on, it's the fact that Aubrey Miles is the most beautiful Pinay celebrity right now. She's got mad sex appeal, she's funny, and hey! - even I find her attractive.

I don't think anyone would disagree with me on this one.

Ladies and Gentlemen, please pick your jaws up off the floor.

I was first "introduced" to this beauty by my friend, Justin. We were sending e-mails back and forth debating over who was hotter: Amanda Griffith or Aubrey Miles. I was for Amanda whereas Justin was all Aubrey. He had really good points as to why Aubrey was hotter. For one thing, she's full blooded Pinay unlike Amanda who is half-British or something. Another, she's mad sexy. She's not too skinny, not too curvaceous, just right. She's morena (dark-skinned) but that doesn't even matter in her case. Man, I wish I had her body, her appeal, her sexiness. I find her extremely attractive.

Now don't get me wrong, I'm not a lesbo or bisexual or whatever. I can appreciate the art form of the female human body as much as a man can. And I'm not afraid to speak up and tell a man if I think that the chick he drools over is sexy enough for me to feel the same way about. In fact, I think men find it a turn-on when a girl talks about another girl's physical attributes. Shit, I find it highly erotic at times as well.

Plus, being able to pinpoint what is sexy and what is not helps you to figure out what you may want in the opposite sex and in yourself. I'm very comfortable with my sexuality and how my body looks. I'm not saying that I have a body worth modeling the way Aubrey can (although I truly wish I did). At the same time, I do understand that I'm not hideous. It's also about flaunting what you got and having confidence in your appearance. I have enough guts to be able to tell myself that I can work with the positive physical stuff I got to my advantage. Use what the good Lord gave ya. In other words, "Shake watcha momma gave ya!"

I find that once someone is confident in who they are and their abilities, be it physical or personality-wise, then you are SEXY. Having the big butt and perfect curves are just the icing on the cake. It's how you project it that makes people give you a second glance. That's why Aubrey Miles is the hottest chick out there right now. She's got confidence, she's aggressive, and she's got the looks to go with it.

This past week, I've also decided to "sex up" my image. I've been wearing minimal make-up to work this whole week (that's a record!); I've been more courageous with regards to my outfits and clothes, revealing a little more skin than usual; and I've just been oozing with confidence lately. It's funny, too. - I didn't even realize that I was doing so until my guy co-workers and friends asked me what was up and why I seemed to have a certain "glow" these days. That totally boosted my confidence even more.

I like this change. I think I need a change. Yes, change is good.

Comment! (1) | Recommend!

Wednesday. 3.3.04 2:20 pm
I will always remember your fingers on my face.

And how they summon
images of bamboo leaves spinning
in the unhurried dance of free fall.

Your fingers have given my face
what, in speech, would be called a name
and what the mind would call a memory

And such memory reveals the wisdom of making room.

When the bamboo hollows itself
in anticipation of water, and wind,
and lips that thirst for water or music,

It frees slender bamboo leaves that anticipate no use or need.

I will remember your fingers
and how you touched my face
with your eyes.

There is no word
for what the heart endures
in the single moment

When space is re-created

To make room
for dreams of wind
and of slender bamboo leaves falling.

Comment! (2) | Recommend!

1 to 10
Monday. 3.1.04 5:01 pm

1. proof of registration (damn CHP)
2. proof of insurance (once again, damn CHP)
3. Winnie-the-Pooh blankie
4. picture of Aliyah
5. lighter (just cause...)
6. cds
7. spare tire & jack (Jason and my dad taught me how to fix a flat, yea!)
9. napkins or kleenex
10. windshield visors (but I haven't been using them lately cause of the ugly-a$$ rain)


1. undies
2. bra
3. my access ID for work
4. Victoria Secret lip gloss in "Pink Slip" (I love it!)
5. Estee Lauder mascara
6. hooded jacket
7. ring (pasalubong from Pinas or the one from my special someone )
8. earrings
9. Movado watch (I need another watch for everyday use)


1. Princess Garden house fried rice
2. Tonkatsu with Miso soup & rice
3. Bud's Burgers!
4. Thai iced tea
5. Juice plus shakes!
6. Venti mocha Frappucinos with whipped cream & hazelnut
7. Round Table pizza
8. My momma's home cooking


1. Tracy
2. Shauna
3. Helene
4. Justin
5. Jason
6. Romy Fe
7. Quyen


1. City of God
2. Y Tu Mama Tambien
4. Kill Bill
5. Antwone Fisher
6. Frida


1. poster of Legolas (thanks Jason!)
2. Frank's toys & bed
3. my DVD collection
4. photo albums & books galore
5. Sony VAIO laptop


1. Princess Garden house fried rice
2. my dad's superb steak
3. can of Coke
4. Sky Flakes crackers


1. my ATM/Debit card
2. my glasses
3. my cellphone


1. "The Pleasure of My Company" by Steve Martin
2. current People magazine - J.Lo and Marc Anthony are together. Yuck!


1. Francis Charlie aka Frank the Tank (he's actually my puppy, does he still count?)

Comment! (3) | Recommend!

The Passion of the Christ
Friday. 2.27.04 12:53 pm
The following is a review of Mel Gibson's film, the long awaited "The Passion of the Christ". I, personally, have not yet been able to watch the film but I will later on tonight.

The woman who wrote this review captured the essence of this film quite well. Even though, I haven't yet watched the film, just the way she describes it gives me goosebumps and gets me teary-eyed.


Jody Dean wrote this: (She is a Dallas TV anchor).

There've been a ton of emails and forwards floating around recently from those who've had the privilege of seeing Mel Gibson's "The Passion Of The Christ" prior to its actual release. I thought I'd give you my reaction after seeing it last night.

The screening was on the first night of "Elevate!" a weekend-long seminar for young people at Prestonwood Baptist Church in Plano. There were about 2,000 people there, and the movie was shown after several speakers had taken the podium. It started around 9 and finished around 11...so I reckon the film is about two hours in length. Frankly, I lost complete track of time - so I can't be sure. I want you to know that I started in broadcasting when I was 13-years-old.

I've been in the business of writing, performing, production, and broadcasting for a long time. I've been a part of movies, radio, television, stage and other productions - so I know how things are done. I know about soundtracks and special effects and make-up and screenplays. I think I've seen just about every kind of movie or TV show ever made – from extremely inspirational to extremely gory. I read a lot, too - and have covered stories and scenes that still make me wince. I also have a vivid imagination, and have the ability to picture things as they must have happened - or to anticipate things as they will be portrayed. I've also seen an enormous amount of footage from Gibson's film, so I thought I knew what was coming.

But there is nothing in my existence - nothing I could have read, seen, heard, thought, or known - that could have prepared me for what I saw on screen last night.

This is not a movie that anyone will "like". I don't think it's a movie anyone will "love". It certainly doesn't "entertain". There isn't even the sense that one has just watched a movie. What it is, is an experience – on a level of primary emotion that is scarcely comprehensible. Every shred of human preconception or predisposition is utterly stripped away. No one will eat popcorn during this film. Some may not eat for days after they've seen it. Quite honestly, I wanted to vomit. It hits that hard.

I can see why some people are worried about how the film portrays the Jews. They should be worried. No, it's not anti-Semitic. What it is, is entirely shattering. There are no "winners". No one comes off looking "good" - except Jesus. Even His own mother hesitates. As depicted, the Jewish leaders of Jesus' day merely do what any of us would have done - and still do. They protected their perceived "place", their sense of safety and security, and the satisfaction of their
own "rightness". But everyone falters. Caiphus judges. Peter denies. Judas betrays. Simon the Cyrene balks. Mark runs away. Pilate equivocates. The crowd mocks. The soldiers laugh. Longinus still stabs with his pilus. The centurion still carries out his orders. And as Jesus fixes them all with a glance, they still turn away.

The Jews, the Romans, Jesus' friends - they all fall. Everyone, except the Principal Figure. Heaven sheds a single, mighty tear - and as blood and water spew from His side, the complacency of all creation is eternally shattered.

The film grabs you in the first five seconds, and never lets go. The brutality, humiliation, and gore is almost inconceivable - and still probably doesn't go far enough. The scourging alone seems to never end, and you cringe at the sound and splatter of every blow - no matter how steely your nerves. Even those who have known combat or prison will have trouble, no matter their experience - because this Man was not conscripted. He went willingly, laying down His entirety for all. It is one thing for a soldier to die for his countrymen. It's something else entirely to think of even a common man dying for those who hate and wish to kill him. But this is no common man. This is the King of the Universe. The idea that anyone could or would have gone through such punishment is unthinkable - but this Man was completely innocent, completely holy - and paying the price for others. He screams as He is laid upon the cross, "Father, they don't know. They don't know..."

What Gibson has done is to use all of his considerable skill to portray the most dramatic moment of the most dramatic events since the dawn of time. There is no escape. It's a punch to the gut that puts you on the canvas, and you don't get up. You are simply confronted by the horror of what was done - what had to be done - and why. Throughout the entire film, I found myself apologizing.

What you've heard about how audiences have reacted is true. There was no sound after the film's conclusion. No noise at all. No one got up. No one moved. The only sound one could hear was sobbing. In all my years of public life, I have never heard anything like that.

I told many of you that Gibson had reportedly re-shot the ending to include more "hope" through the Resurrection? That's not true. The Resurrection scene is perhaps the shortest in the entire movie - and yet it packs a punch that can't be quantified. It is perfect. There is no way to negotiate the meaning out of it. It simply asks, "Now, what will you do?"

I'll leave the details to you, in the hope that you will see the film - but one thing above all stands out, and I have to tell you about it. It comes from the end of Jesus' temptations in the wilderness - where the Bible says Satan left him "until a more opportune time". I imagine Satan never quit tempting Christ, but this film captures beyond words the most opportune time. At every step of the way, Satan is there at Jesus' side – imploring Him to quit, reasoning with Him to give up, and
seducing Him to surrender.

For the first time, one gets a heart-stopping idea of the sense of madness that must have enveloped Jesus - a sense of the evil that was at His very elbow. The physical punishment is relentless - but it's the sense of psychological torture that is most overwhelming. He should have quit. He should have opened His mouth. He should have called 10,000 angels. No one would have blamed Him. What we deserve is obvious. But He couldn't do that. He wouldn't do that. He didn't do that. He doesn't do that. It was not and is not His character. He was obedient, all the way to the cross - and you feel the real meaning of that phrase in a place the human heart usually doesn't dare to go. You understand that we are called to that same level of obedience. With Jesus' humanity so irresistibly on display, you understand that we have no excuse. There is no place to hide.

The truth is this: Is it just a "movie"? In a way, yes. But it goes far beyond that, in a fashion I've never felt - in any forum. We may think we "know". We know nothing. We've gone 2,000 years - used to the idea of a pleasant story, and a sanitized Christ. We expect the ending, because we've heard it so many times. God forgive us. This film tears that all away. It's is as close as any of us will ever get to knowing, until we fully know. Paul understood. "Be urgent, in and out of season."

Luke wrote that Jesus reveals Himself in the breaking of the bread. Exactly. "The Passion Of The Christ" shows that Bread being broken.

Go see this movie.

Comment! (1) | Recommend!

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